


Stars in the sky

by cancan223



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-05
Updated: 2017-10-19
Packaged: 2018-08-29 06:28:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 17,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8478793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cancan223/pseuds/cancan223
Summary: Clarke starts medschool in a new town. Away from her fake friends. She meets new people and starts a new life with some twists and turns. Lexa is a mysterious person who she meets on a party and things progress from there.





	1. Living in the present

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone,
> 
> sooo, this is my first fanfic ever. Like ever. Don't know if I am a decent writer but I guess I will find out :) Enjoy and I hope you like it! Tips and tricks are more than welcome, if it is about writing style or the content, please comment!  
> English isn't my first language so excuse me for the mistakes. This is a short chapter. The coming chapters will be longer!  
> For now it is rated as teen audiences and up.

“Uh, maybe I should go home. I am a little tired” Clarke sighs as she hears the loud music boom all the way over to the end of the street on which they are walking. “No way Clarke, you’re coming with us!” Raven clutches her arm and pulls her towards the house at the end of the street.  
She can see more people walking towards the villa. Most of them are holding some sort of booze and are swaying on the streets.  
“Oh this is going to be so much fun! I’m so excited to see all the new students!” Octavia shouts while she does a silly little dance next to them. “Yeah right” Raven smirks. “You’re just hoping to seduce a new target.” “Oughs that hurts Raven, I’m not so shallow!” Octavia exclaims but with a hint of a smile so we all know that’s exactly what she is trying to do.  
Clarke still can’t believe she lets her friends drag her to the start of the college year party. It is supposed to be the best party of the year. And since it’s the start, everybody comes. To get laid or to get wasted. Because that’s what students do.  
Clarke has had her fair share of booze but she was hoping to make a fresh and good start at her new study and going to this party isn’t really the best decision. After switching to medschool, she’s ready to prove her parents that this is the best choice for her, even though they don’t think so.

She looks to her left and see Raven and Octavia giggling and talking about boys while Raven still clutches her arm, like she is going to run away and escape if she lets go. Okay fair enough, that’s probably what she would do if Raven let’s go.  
They have almost reached the house and now Clarke can see lights erupting from the windows. There are lots of people on the front yard of the house. Some are dancing, playing beer pong or just sitting and smoking. Probably weed. She doesn’t recognise anyone from this distance but then again she doesn’t know many people yet in this new city. Her new study required her to move to Arkanos city but fortunately Raven and Octavia are already studying at Ark college so that’s a relief.

The house self is huge, with three floors and a large balcony on the front. “Guys, from whom is this place, it’s huge!” Clarke asks her friends while admiring the architectural wonder in front of her. “It’s from someone named Gus or something.” Octavia explains. “Every year he holds this party at his parents’ house while they are away on vacation and every year the cops are called. Supposedly halfway during the year there’s another party but only a few people are invited.” She pouts and shrugs. “I actually don’t know who this Gus guy is so there is no hope for me being invited to the Lighthouse party.” “It’s called the lighthouse party?” Clarke asks. “Yeah, the rumour goes that they buy tons of firework and drive off with all the party people to the shore and have a magnificent firework show. Other people say it’s the best thing ever!” Raven says. “Maybe on this party I will finally meet Gus and beg for an invitation” Octavia says as she takes a bottle of tequila laying on the steps to the entrance. “Oh yeah, let this party start!” She takes a huge swig from the bottle and passes it to Raven. “Ew, not even with salt and lemon. That’s gross…” Raven comments but still drinks anyway. She passes the bottle to Clarke. Clarke takes a small sip but under encouragement from Octavia and Raven drinks a more decent amount.  
Oh well, it’s for the best she thinks. Where is the fun in being completely sober? Still Clarke stays careful with drinking. In the past, it didn’t always end well and she doesn’t want a repeat of certain events. She walks through the door after Octavia and Raven. Already when entering the house it is very crowded. People are everywhere, having a chat or playing a game or just drinking booze. Some don’t look too great. On the way to the kitchen, where the booze is, (of course Octavia wants to go there) they walk past the living room where apparently the loudest music is coming from. The furniture is shoved to the sideways and in de middle, people are dancing. She has to stop for a second and wait for some people to move so they can get to the kitchen. She hears Octavia muttering something like: those annoying freshmen, they are everywhere…  
While waiting, Clarke looks over to the dance floor and tries to spot some people she knows, which is hard because the room has been made darker and there crowd is pretty huge. But then she sees a head poking above most of the people and she recognises Bellamy, who is dancing with some other people. She can’t really see who they are. “Hey, look Oc. Your brother Bell is here!” She nudges Octavia in the stomach. “Don’t do that! You know I am ticklish!” Upon saying that, of course Raven and Clarke start a stomach poking war. The common enemy is Octavia and she is squirming under their fingers. “No, noo stop! I surrender! I surrender!” Octavia is now laughing so hard that some people turn their head to see if everything is okay. She proceeds to stand and finally they make their way to the kitchen were all the booze is. On the counter is an array of bottles, some full, some empty. Red solo cups are littered on the floor and the counter and Raven looks for some clean ones.  
They take shots together while toasting on the new year that is ahead of them.

  
Clarke is so excited to start! She has always dreamed of being a doctor but her parents disapproved. They thought it would be too hard and she would never be able to finish. And after all that partying in the past, she understands them. She barely finished high school because of all the parties and the bad influence of some “friends”. They weren’t really her friends. But only because her mother was a famous artist and her family had some sort of high status, the popular girls pressured her in hanging out with them. At first it seemed genuine but in the last grade she had enough of the fake shit she had to do every day. She also had enough of the fake boyfriends. To pretend she was someone only to get people to like her. She was so tired of it. So one day, in her last year, she told her fake friends to suck it and stopped partying and getting drunk all the time. It was a good decision, although her ex-friends started loathing her the moment she turned away. After high-school she began with art school but quickly felt that she didn’t belong there. She loved making paintings and the creativity but never saw herself in the future between her colleague artists. So with only 2 months to go of her first year, she quit her study and worked until she could start again the next year. In a new city with a new study and hopefully some new friends. Clarke really hopes that she can now find a place where she has the feeling she belongs. Where she can be herself and be accepted as who she is. It is so hard to keep up the façade of being someone who the rest of the world expect you to be. It is tiring and Clarke is now driven to stop being a person who she thinks she should be but to just be her. The people from her past made her feel like she was nothing without their acceptance and their liking and she hates to be so depend of others. Octavia and Raven were some sort of salvation. They stood by her in her last year of high school, when everyone abandoned her. They were her real friends. She knew them from her childhood. And although she didn’t hang out with them when she was part of the popular group, she could always return to them and be herself. They supported her no matter what and she is so grateful that those two beautiful people want her in their life. When it is Christmas, Clarke is planning to do something special for them to show that she really is glad with them as friends. She doesn’t know yet what to do but she will figure it out. For now, she is ready to party with her friends and forget about the past and live in the present.  
 


	2. A break

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the next chapter is here! I would be very happy if you could review and give your thoughts about this chapter or story :)

After finishing a couple of shots they bring their filled cups with them to the living room to start dancing. Octavia already feels light in her head and starts giggling. “Okay watch me.” She says and she treads to a group of people, mostly boys, dancing in the outer circle of the crowd. She taps one of the boys on the shoulder and gives him her drink. “Hold this.” Then Octavia starts to do some kind of weird dance in the middle of the group.

“She doesn’t know them right?” Clarke asks Raven.

“No she doesn’t. She is crazy haha. Where did we find her?”

Raven is laughing and watching Octavia, who is still dancing but now starts to challenge one of the boys in the group to a dance-off. The boy who was challenged by Octavia is a muscular guy with tattoos. First he is like, what the hell is this but as being as intoxicated as the rest of the people, quickly starts to show some break dance moves to defy Octavia. The show-off goes back and forth and now more people are starting to watch the two dance. Not that they dance very good, but they draw attention. Probably because Octavia is screaming and the other guy is making loud animal noises. The party people make a circle around them and they cheer them on. Clarke and Raven are encouraging Octavia to win and to let that guy show some ass! On the next song is a heavy beat, which motivates Octavia to dance even more and to twist and shake her body to the rhythm. She approaches the tattoo guy and dances around him, including a subtle touch here and there.  
That’s her way Clarke guesses for making an advance. The tattoo guy responds to her dancing more sensually and continues to do the same. They exaggerate their sensual dancing and are laughing now the whole time. Some other guy joins them and they start to sandwich Octavia. The crowd cheers and people are laughing at the fun show they are given. Finally the song is over and Octavia collapses as she is exhausted. The tattoo guy helps her up and whispers something in her ear.  
  
“It is definitely not a freshman!” Clarke has to shout to Riven because the music is so loud.

“Nahh, this is one of her seducing traps.” Raven shouts back. “I have seen it coming for a long time!”  
Octavia and her dance partner step out of the circle and are walking towards Riven and Clarke, presumably to go to the kitchen.

“See ya later bitchess!” Octavia yells at them and follows the muscles into the kitchen.

“Well, I don’t think we’ll be seeing her anytime soon…” Raven frowns and looks at Clarke.  
Yeah indeed, Clarke thinks.

They make their way to Bellamy and Jasper and Monty who are dancing and joking around at the other end of the room. Pushing away the last people, Clarke finally sees the boys and tries to tackle Bellamy. But being much bigger and stronger than her, it is useless.   
  
“Ah Clarkey, that’s never going to happen!” Bellamy picks her up and starts spinning with her on his shoulders.   
  
“No, noo stop Bell! I’m getting dizzy!” Clarke yells, but to no avail. She then starts to make puking sounds and immediately Bellamy puts her down.

“Good to see you here in Arkanos Clarke. It isn’t the same without you!” Bellamy looks at her with a big grin on his face.

“Yes, it is definitely good to be here.” Clarke answers and smiles fondly back at him.

 She has known the Blakes since she was little and practically grew up together since they were neighbours. She sees Bellamy as her brother she never had, and Octavia as her sister. They have also become very good friends and she is very glad they are a part of her life. With their mother Aurora, their house was a second home and she always felt very safe and secure around the Blakes. And fortunately both Bellamy and Octavia are studying at Ark college.

Next to Bellamy are Monty and Jasper. She waves at them. They are Bellamy’s roommates and she has visited Octavia and Bellamy a couple of times when she was still studying at the art school.  
After some small talk, the group starts to party with the rest of the people and the hours progress. Octavia joins them after an hour and introduces the guy she had been dancing with.

“Hey guys, this is Lincoln, he’s also studying at Ark college.” Octavia says to the group.

Bellamy eyes the guys suspiciously but after some talking decides he is a good guy. Lincoln is looking rather tough with his tattoos and shaven head. And being quite big and muscular as well. But Clarke senses he is rather a nice guy who treats people well. She can already see that he likes Octavia, and Octavia him (although she isn’t quite sure if it’s only the alcohol working). At least he isn’t trying to get into her pants; yet. But she is sure Bellamy will keep an eye on her sister like he always does. He is very protective over Octavia, which sometimes drives O mad but it is all with the best intentions. Without a father figure at their home, Bellamy had to fulfil the role of being the man in the house and of taking care of the women. And that’s exactly what he did. And although Octavia occasionally complained about Bellamy being so protective, Clarke can always hear from her voice that she loves him in fact pretty much and maybe is secretly kind of happy with him being a bit overprotected. Although she would never say that out loud.  
  


* * *

 

The party is progressing rapidly and its already getting quite late. And after a couple of hours, Clarke is not really in a party mood anymore. She watches the people around them and sees they’re having fun. Of course it also helps that they have been drinking the entire time and getting a refill whenever possible. Clarke also had had her fair share of booze but she keeps it at a decent level. She definitely doesn’t want to wake up the following day with a big hangover. It’s not like is she is not having fun, but her friends are definitely very tipsy and she is now just on another level. Which is fine, but from experience, she knows that in the late hours, alcohol definitely allows you to keep dancing longer and doing crazy things. Next to that, the people around her, including her friends are all getting sweaty from all that dancing and from the temperature inside, which you could say is quite hot with so many people crowded in one place.

She decides to get some fresh air and tells Raven she is out in the backyard.  
She has seen the backyard through the glasses in the kitchen when they got some drinks early in the evening. It was already dark outside so she couldn’t see that much but it looked like it was a massive garden. Which should be no surprise as the house is also massive.

So Clarke enters the kitchen and has to enter a second room next to the kitchen were one of the glass doors can be opened so she can go outside. When she opens the door she is immediately greeted by a gush of fresh cool air. It is a welcome breeze as she was feeling rather warm from being inside so long.  
A couple of students are sitting on the patio where a camp fire is being lit. It has a nice and relaxed atmosphere but Clarke actually wants a moment alone and so she walks past the students and further into the garden, which is indeed, massive. As she walks along the pathway she starts to hum a song and enjoys the fresh air. There are many trees and bushes in the garden and she can see profiles of couples hidden in the nooks and crannies of the beautifully designed backyard. She can’t really see clearly what they are doing but she is guessing it is not really meant for her to see. So she walks on and the further she walks, the less people she meets.  
Now, she is quite far from the house, although she can faintly still hear the music and see the light pouring out of it.

On the pathway from the backyard itself are strategically placed lanterns which emit a dim light that guides her way. The pathway leads her to the right and now the house is out of sight as she walks past some thick bushes sticking out of the ground. The pathway splits around the turn and she has to choose between two paths emerging from one. The decision is quickly made as she sees another couple at the far end of the right pathway against a tree so she chooses the left. It is a bit darker and less inviting but she doesn’t want to intrude nor see the couple kissing or doing God knows what. After a couple of meters there is yet another turn and she is curious as to what she will find at the end of the turn. She can already see faint light glowing around the corner and when she completes the turn she enters a secluded part of the garden.

 It is lit by two lanterns. The secluded part is densely populated with bushes and flowers in all types and sizes. She can’t really see the colours of the flowers but it must be lovely. In the middle of the round area is a big oaken tree with massive branches. From one of the branches hanging is a swing. Clarke hadn’t noticed yet but there is actually a person sitting on the swing, lightly swinging with the back to her. She can see the person has long hair and a slender figure so most likely it would be a girl. The place, with the girl looks kind of magical.  
Clarke, although not in Art school anymore appreciates beauty when she sees it and this is definitely a beautiful place to be.  
‘If I only had such a garden.’ Clarke sighs. But then laughs because a student never ever can afford this place.  
She didn’t realize she laughed out loud because the girl on the swing jumps up and turns at the sound.

“Oh err, hi. Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” Clarke apologises to the girl.

“Oh, it’s okay.” The girl says to her with a soft voice. She is holding on to the one rope of the swing. “I just didn’t expect anyone to come this far out in the garden. Most people are staying close to the house.”

“Yeah I didn’t expect see someone here as well. I just needed a break from the party. It is very crowded inside and very hot so I just wanted to get some fresh air and have a moment for myself.” Clarke says to the girl as she takes a step closer.

“But let me introduce myself first, I’m Clarke,” she smiles and offers the girl her hand.

The other girl takes her hand and shakes it. Her skin is very soft and Clarke is mesmerized by her long slender fingers. From what she can see in the soft glowing light is that the colour of her skin is like olive. She looks the other girl in the eyes and is met by the most intense eyes she has ever seen. The colour of her eyes is a warm and fascinating kind of green and Clarke has difficulty not staring at them the entire time.

“Hey, I’m Lexa.” The girl finally answers her with a soft voice.

“So Lexa, you also needed a break from the party?” Clarke asks her.

“Yes, although I’m here for quite some time now,” Lexa answers. “There are just too many people for my liking. And I like this part of the garden very much,” She adds shyly.

“Oh you have been here before?” Clarke asks the girl and observes her. She has long chestnut hair which falls in curls over her shoulders.

“Yes, my aunt and cousins live in this house and I visited a lot.” Lexa answers as she eyes Clarke.

  
They are both silent now. It is not a common thing for Clarke. Most of the times she doesn’t have any difficulty speaking to strangers but there is something with Lexa that makes her feel at a loss of words. The silence doesn’t feel forced though, it is rather pleasant.  
They can hear some soft music coming from the house and the two lanterns in this area add to the serenity of this place.

“So… do you want to sit on the swing?” Lexa asks as she puts her hands in her pockets.

“Oh yeah sure.” Clarke replies and they both walk towards the swing. It is a kind of a luxurious one, with an actual bench stuffed with pillows on it.

  
Lexa isn’t quite sure why she invited the other girl to come sit with here. She has been out here for almost the whole time. There is no point in trying to sleep in the house with all the noise, so she just waits till the noise is turned down, either because it is the end of the party or by complaints from the neighbours. The party bewilders her, she is not good at that type of social interaction. And normally she is very apprehensive of people she doesn’t know. But there is something different with Clarke. She can’t really figure out what, but she has a feeling she can trust Clarke. And maybe it is too soon to tell, but like Anya told her many times, she should let people into her life more. So she sits down with Clarke on the swing and looks at the magnificent view this place gives on the city below them.

“Wow, this is amazing!” Clarke softly exclaims as she sees the view for the first time.

“Yes… yes it is,” Lexa softly murmurs as she glances at Clarke. Her blonde hair is softly moving in the wind and the smile on her face is infectious.

This place, which is already one of her favourite places in the world, always makes her feel happy.  
It is truly a magical place…


	3. Make a wish

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heya guys, I'm still a bit struggling with grammar and that kind of things, so excuse me for the mistakes i made. I hope you like this chapter! If you have any suggestions or tips, I would be very happy if you could review! Every comment is more than welcome, even if it is critique! This is my first fanfic, so I'm still figuring out how to do this kind of stuff :p

Looking at all the lights of the city below them, Clarke feels calm and peaceful. Something she didn’t feel for quite some time. In the past, she always felt the need to prove herself. But now, starting in a new city and at a new college, with none of her old acquaintances or the pressure from her parents, she could live her life the way she wants. It feels good.  
Next to her, Lexa is also staring at the lights, looking like she is in deep thought. It is peculiar, Clarke felt immediately at ease with the other girl. Her soft radiance made Clarke feel peaceful and she is eager to get to know the other girl.

Suddenly she sees a firefly flying at the edge of the secluded area in front of her. She follows it with her eyes as it flies around, seeming to fly meaningless in no direction. She doesn’t really like insects but this one, adds to the magic of the place. It starts to fly upwards so she leans backwards and lifts her head upwards to the sky. And there she sees the most stunning night view ever. All the stars in the sky made for a spectacular view. Clarke didn’t think she ever saw so many stars. She could even see a faint glimmer of the Milky Way, the galaxy far above her.

“Wow, look at all those stars in the sky!” Clarke gasped as she nudged Lexa. “It’s so beautiful! I don’t think I have ever seen so many!”

“Yeah, it’s amazing, isn’t it?” Lexa replies as she giggles softly at the response the night view elicited from Clarke.  
“This is one of the reasons why I like this place so much. The house is outside the inner city so there is not much light pollution, especially if you walk all the way to this area of the garden.”

For some time they both were gazing at the sky above them. All of a sudden they see a falling star moving rapidly above them.  
“Oh we can make a wish!” Clarke exclaimed and looks at Lexa. Lexa nods and they both make a wish, not knowing that their dreams of the heart entwined both of their faiths together.

“So… you said that you frequently visited your aunt and nephews who are living here. Do your parents live near this place?” Clarke asked Lexa as she turns slightly on the swing so she could hold a proper conversation with her.

“Well uhh… I-I live with my sister Anya a couple of streets away from here. My parents… I don’t really have contact with them anymore…”, Lexa answered her as she felt a lump rising in her throat. It was still a sore subject and she didn’t like talking about it. Clarke sensed this and knew she shouldn’t press forward.

“Oh… I’m sorry.”

Lexa ducks her head down and looks at the ground.

“Are you studying at the moment?” Clarke asks, desperate to change the subject.

“Yes, I’m studying psychology, at Ark college. I’m now in my second year.”

“Oh that’s nice! I am also starting at Ark college this year. Going into med school.”

Lexa’s eyes lit up at that statement. “Oh you’re also going to study at Ark college? That’s cool.”

“Yeah, luckily I know some people already so I’m not on my own.” Clarke says as she looks at Lexa.  
Every time she looks at her eyes she can’t look away from them. It’s like they are magnets, drawing her closer and not letting go.

“And your sister? Is she studying too?” Clarke asks, still staring at Lexa’s eyes.

“No, no she is working already. Like a proper civilian.” Lexa answers as she returns the staring Clarke gives her. Now there is silence and it is kind of awkward because they are both looking at each other not really knowing what to say.

“Your eyes… They are so beautiful.” Clarke murmurs. And then, realizing she said it out loud, quickly clasps her hand over her mouth and starts to turn red. Hoping very hard that Lexa didn’t hear her. But to no avail.

“Oh… Ehm… yeah… thank you.” Lexa stammers and is blushing too.

_Oh God_ , Clarke thinks. _Here we go again, making a fool of myself in front of a person I barely know_. Luckily her phone starts to buzz in her pocket and very happy at the distraction, Clarke takes it out and looks at the message she received.

“Oh oh, my friends are in trouble. Octavia is supposedly not feeling well, which is no surprise. I have to go and take her home.” She looks up at Lexa with a guilty expression, not really wanting to leave the girl.

“That’s fine, you should go help her,” Lexa smiles at her and gets up from the swing.

“Are you staying here?” Clarke asks as she gets up as well and is now standing before Lexa.

“Yes, I think I might stay here for a little while,” Lexa answers as she rocks back and forth on the ball of her feet.

“Okay, well, it was very nice meeting you Lexa. Maybe I will see you at Ark college?”

“Yes, I hope so. It was nice meeting you too Clarke,” Lexa smiles at Clarke. It is a dazzling smile and Clarke hopes very much to see that smile again soon.

She walks towards the bend in the pathway and turns her head to look at Lexa one more time. Lexa is still watching her with emerald eyes. With a small wave of her hand she turns the corner and Lexa is out of sight. It is a pity she has to go, she would have liked to get to know Lexa more. From the first second she was near Lexa, Clarke could feel herself at ease, the girl emitted a friendly spirit. And her eyes were really enthralling, Clarke sighs, as those emerald eyes are now stored in her head.

  ~~~~

* * *

 

Lexa sees Clarke disappear behind the bushes and keeps standing a little longer, rocking back and forth. She is replaying the moment that just happened in her head again. _Can it really be that I just met a nice person?_ Lexa thought as she moved again to sit on the swing. Clarke was really friendly to her, she made her feel comfortable. It was not something she felt with many people. The people who got that privilege were her sister and her aunt and cousins. She doesn’t want to think about the horrible people who made her feel so insecure and unworthy. But still their words had made a way to her heart and occasionally those awful words were still sounding like the truth sometimes inside her head. She hated that those people had and still have such a big influence on her life.

  
She can already hear Anya saying to her, _‘Don’t think about that Lex, just go on. Those people are not worth your attention!’_  
Anya always knew exactly when those bad thoughts invaded her brain. She would give her a hug and rubbed on her head. If it wasn’t for Anya, God knows what would have happened… Anya was lucky to escape their home when she was 16. Lexa, still being a few years younger, had to wait until she could follow her, far away from her wretched family.

Lexa shudders, she doesn’t want to think about them anymore, ever again. So she thinks about Clarke instead and immediately a smile appears on her face. Clarke, with her nice blonde curls and soft face and those piercing blue eyes. She is a very beautiful girl, Lexa noted that immediately. She was even surprised that Clarke wanted to talk to her. Hopefully they would meet again at Ark college.  
Sighing, Lexa went on looking at the view again, hoping the party wouldn’t last too long. Anya forced her to go out here and not come home until the next day. Of course she knew the intentions behind that action, but that wasn’t to say she was very pleased with it! Well actually, she might change her mind about that. If it wasn’t for Anya, she wouldn’t have met Clarke. Slightly swinging on the swing, she was very pleased to tell Anya that she actually met and talked with a real person except for her cousins. Yes, she thought with a smile, maybe life isn’t all that bad.

 

* * *

 

 Clarke hurried back on the pathway to the house already imagining scenarios in which her best friend played a part. It didn’t matter which party they would go to, at the end Octavia had to be dragged home, slurring heavily and sometimes even giving back the whole contents of her stomach to the street.

Well, change those sometimes to many times.

Clarke absolutely didn’t mind a single bit helping Octavia get back to her house, even if she had to leave the party earlier. In the past, Raven and O had done the same thing to Clarke and she remembers she was always very grateful that her friends were there to help her. But this time, the timing couldn’t be more unsuitable and she wished Octavia could have lasted half an hour longer. She looks at her watch and is shocked at the time it displayed. She was only away for a couple of minutes in the garden right?

“Hey beautiful, wanna make out?” A guy suddenly draped an arm around her shoulders and starting breathing in her ear. Very heavily and very gross. It was obvious he was intoxicated as he hung with almost his full weight on her. Pushing him off of her, laughing a bit in herself as he tumbled to the grass, she sped up and made her way to the house.

Checking her phone to see where her friends were, she walks inside passing now a few students still sitting on the patio. The campfire had burned down, the ashes still glowing. It started to get a bit chilly outside so Clarke was happy she could return to the warm temperature inside. Walking towards the front of the house, searching for a room her friends apparently were in, at least the text said so, Clarke looks around and sees the party coming to an end. All littered on the floor are red solo cups and funnily some people were crashed on the couches or the floor, some of them in weird positions.

She finally finds the room and walks inside, greeted by sight of her friends keeping Octavia standing, including her dancing partner Lincoln.

“Heyah Clarkeyyy, nice to see youuu. As you can see, I’mmmm in quite a predicaaaament”, Octavia says to Clarke while giggling. Raven looks at her with a frown on her face. “Ready to take her home Clarke?” Bellamy asks, still somewhat coming off as sober although Clarke suspects none of her friends really are.

“I have a car, I can drive you guys home if you want.” Lincoln says as he looks a bit concerned at Octavia.

“Oh don’t worry - Lincoln was it right? This happens all the time. It would be very nice if you could bring us home. Although I have to ask, you didn’t drink too much right?” Clarke stepped forward and joined in supporting Octavia.

“No, I only had two drinks tonight, so don’t worry as well.” Lincoln winked at Clarke and together with Bellamy and herself, they managed to half carry Octavia outside to Lincolns car which was parked on the sideway across the street. Raven didn’t look too great either but at least she could stay upright and walk, although swaying a little.

They put Octavia in the backseat and Clarke joined her keeping her from falling down, while Raven took place in the front seat as Lincoln got behind the wheel.  
As Clarke put on her seatbelt, after struggling with Octavia’s, Bellamy tapped on the window on her side motioning for her to roll it down.

“Hey Clarke, unfortunately we haven’t talked much tonight. I really want to know how you are Clarke.” Bellamy said to her as Clarke rolled the window down. Affectionately smiling back at Bellamy, Clarke replied “Yeah Bell, it has been a long time. We will hang out at the cafe at Ark college sometime, from what I’ve heard from O it supposed to be a nice place.”

Lincoln was ready to go so Bellamy stepped away from the car. “I will text you Clarkey!” Bellamy yelled at her while they drove away. “And take care of my little sis!” He added while waving at them.

Smiling at the nickname the Blakes used to call her since she was young, and keeping it in practice, she peers through the window staring at nothing in particular.  
Octavia scoots closer and leans against Clarke.

“Thank you Clarke”, she whispers and her head rests on Clarke’s shoulder.

Clarke looks at her and sees Octavia is already almost asleep by now. She chuckles slightly and presses a kiss on the top of her head.  
It seems that in the front Raven is also dozing off. Enjoying the silence, Clarke stares out of the window again during the ride home.

After 15 minutes, they arrive at Raven and Octavia’s dorm and Lincoln helps her with carrying Octavia to her bed.  
After waving goodbye to Lincoln and guiding Raven to her room, she crashes on the couch in their living room figuring the 10 minute walk to her dorm is too long. She is happy after all, that she went to the party. It was good to see her old friends again and from now on, see can see them more often. And Lexa too. She hopes she gets a chance to get to know her better. With a content feeling, she pulls a blanket, taken out of the closet from Octavia’s room, closer to her and dozes off.


	4. Operation E.B.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heya all! sorry for the long delay. Things aren't going great at the moment and I had to take time off to get myself together. But here is a new chapter. I hope you enjoy it!

With a big yawn, Clarke wakes up on the couch and for a moment is disoriented on where she actually is. Watching the sunlight pour through the curtains, she starts to remember the escapades of last night.

The party… Drunk Octavia… Lexa…

She checks her mobile for new messages but finds nothing so she closes her eyes again and thinks back of last night. It was definitely one hell of a party. And she actually enjoyed it even though she wasn’t total drunk. She can’t actually remember a party where she was more or less sober and where she still had fun. _A good start of the year_ , Clarke thinks and smiles to herself.

“Ohhhww. My head... It feels like it can explode anytime!”

Opening her eyes, Clarke sees Raven exit her room and walk over to the kitchen area. One hand clutching her head and muttering something she can’t hear. Giggling out loud, she sees that Raven’s hair is all over the place and sticking out in weird angles.

“What?” Raven huffs as she fills a large glass of water.

“Nothing. It’s just your hair! Looking wild again. You sure you didn’t hook up?”

Clarke laughs as she remembers one time she walked in on Raven and some guy doing it and her hair was in the exact same style as right now.

“Pfff. Can’t handle your jokes right know Clarke. It is too early and my head is killing me…”

She walks over to Clarke and picks up the end of her legs so she can sit at the end of the couch. Dropping Clarke’s legs on her own lap she says, “Anyway, who says I didn’t?” and gives a big wink to her. Which unfortunately isn’t all that flattering as she is still looking like someone dragged her around the house and ruffled her hair with a pillow.

“Ooohhhh. Who is the lucky guy?”

“Actually I don’t know his name anymore.” Raven tilts her head in a manner to think about it. “It started I think with a W. But I’m not sure.” She lifts her shoulders. “A shame actually. He was a good kisser.”

“So, did you meet anyone cute at the party?” Raven asks as she looks at Clarke.

She is hesitating if she should tell Raven about Lexa. It feels like the whole situation and Lexa itself are mysterious and some kind of secret. Well, it’s not like they did anything. They only talked for about 10 minutes.  
She thinks back of Lexa, the girl with such beautiful emerald eyes and soft skin. There was something about her that radiated sadness. She was very kind and polite but as being as perceptive as she is, she could sense that under that demeanour the brunette was hiding some part of herself that she didn’t want to come to the surface. Oh well, how could she actually know. They only met… But still, she felt a connection already. Like when you meet someone and you instantly know you are going to be friends and time only serves to tell that you were right all along.

So not wanting to spill her magical meeting with Raven until another time, she tries to come up with something. Although her attempt would be futile as she is a terrible liar and her friends know this. And Raven, the smart girl that she is, would figure it out immediately. It’s not that it is some kind of big secret but she likes to keep Lexa to herself for now…

Luckily her answer is spared as Octavia rolls out of her room (almost literally) and makes some cavemen noises.

“Hello there. Someone’s had a good night!” Raven laughs at Octavia. Who drags herself towards the couch.

“Yeah, well it would have been better if you weren’t talking so loud and waking me from my princess sleep.” Octavia growls as she stands at the backside of the couch.

She then proceeds to flip one leg over the backrest, careful not to kick Raven in the head. And then, with full force, lets herself fall directly on top of Raven and Clarke. The latter getting most of her weight.

“Oumpff. Please! O!” Clarke exclaims as she is smothered by the hair of Octavia. She pushes Octavia’s head aside so she can actually breath and they turn and toss until they are somewhat comfortable lying next to each other. Raven is pushing the stinky socks of Octavia out of her face while complaining about how much of a princess she is when she stuffs her feet in someone’s face.

“Don’t move or I might puke…” Octavia mutters while trying to lie still.

Clarke and Raven look in disgust at her but then Octavia proceeds to laugh. “Just joking!!! Look at your faces!” Octavia is laughing hard now and clutching her stomach.

“I have an excellent stomach!” She exclaims.

“Yea, you better have!” Clarke huffs. “But how are you? Everything fine?”

“Oh it’s more than fine!” Octavia says back as she looks between Raven and Clarke. “Thanks for me bringing me home guys. Much appreciated.” She smiles at them both. “I met muscles last night and it was great! Best party ever!”

“I’m surprised you can even remember…” Raven adds sarcastically.

“Well, who wouldn’t remember two strong arms picking you up, as the damsel in distress, and bringing you home? A hot guy… and moi, a hot girl… Perfect match if I may say so.”

“He was handsome indeed.” Clarke says but then looks at Octavia again. “Do you have his number then?”

“Ooohhhh Shoot!!! Noooo.” Octavia wails as she put her hands to her face. “I don’t! Oh my goodness, I’m such an idiot!” She murmurs on, complaining about this inconvenience.

Typical of Octavia. This happened in the past multiple times. She hooking up with some guy but then completely forgetting to give her number. Although Clarke thinks that most of the time it is on purpose. Still, Octavia looked genuinely upset this time so she reckons this Lincoln guy must be someone special.

“You will meet him again O. It’s a college party. So probably he will be studying at Ark college.” Putting a hand on her knee, Raven assures Octavia who is still looking sad. “We just all have to look for him. Maybe Bell, or someone else knows him?”

“Ehe better not my brother,” Octavia snorts. “I said to him I knew Lincoln from college so he didn’t push but you know how he reacts with new guys around me…”

“Okay, well that’s a no go then…” Raven says, but then excitedly looks at Clarke and Octavia. She starts waving with her arm, on the verge of making some big proclamation.

Here we go again, Clarke thinks as she smiles at her. Raven always had big ideas and plans but those big plans mostly just spiralled the three of them in mayhem. With lots of detention and extra work as a consequence. Still, this isn’t high school anymore so how bad could it be right?

“Okay, wait one second!” Raven jumps from the couch, pushing their legs out of her way. The movement almost resulted in them falling of the couch. Raven then runs to her room and slams the door behind her.

Octavia and Clarke look confused at each other.  
“Do you know..? Octavia starts, but Clarke falls in and says “I have no idea…”

After a few minutes, the door to Raven’s room opens. First, one leg comes out. Raven is humming a seduction song and Octavia and Clarke are trying hard not to laugh.

“Get it together Reyes!” Octavia yells as she is laughing out loud now.

Then Raven steps fully out of the room, walks in front of the couch and her friends, and makes a pirouette. “Tadaa,” Raven says as she makes a little bow.

“What on earth are you wearing?” Clarke asks, amazed at the clothes Raven put on. Firstly her head is covered by a shawl. It covers her mouth and nose, so the only thing visible are her eyes. Which aren’t actually visible because she is wearing huge sunglasses. On top of it is a ridiculous hat which does little in covering up her hair. She is also wearing a large black sweater with AC on the front, the initials of Ark College.

Pulling the shawl away from her mouth, Raven starts to speak, “I present to you, operation E.B.!”

In her hand, she has two more sunglasses and gives them to Clarke and Octavia. “Put them on.”

Still confused, Clarke puts on the glasses and waits for an explanation from Raven. Octavia, being impatient as she is, is already hopping her knee up and down. “Well?” she says as she is playing with her sunglasses.

“No, no. This is highly secret! You must put on your sunglasses!” Raven takes it out of her hand and puts it on Octavia’s head.

“There, that’s better. Operation E.B.!” And with a long pause and an excited look on her face, she then says, “Operation Eligible Bachelor! The quest for the perfect guy!” Having a wide smile, she looks at Clarke and Octavia for a reaction.

“You’ve got to be kidding me…” Octavia says while raising one eyebrow.

Meanwhile Clarke is laughing at the ridiculous name Raven came up with.

“Actually I like it Reyes!”, she says to Raven who is still grinning like an idiot. “A secret organization plotting to find O’s eligible bachelor. Hiding somewhere between the students, this mysterious guy is waiting to be found! It sounds perfect! We should make a movie out of it!” Clarke continuous.

“Pfff not so secret if you’re wearing a hoodie with AC initials…” Octavia remarks but then starts to smile as well, seeing the fun both of the other girls have with this plan. And she actually wants to find this Lincoln guy because… Well maybe because she might like him. He was a nice person, from what she gathered from the party and he even was a true gentleman in bringing her home.

“Yeah well, clothing needs to be thought through I guess.” Raven then squeezes herself between Clarke and Octavia. “I presume it is a yes then?” she asks as she looks at her best friends.

“Hell yes!” Octavia shouts and Clarke nods vigorously with her head.

“Alrighty!” Raven sticks one arm out with her hand flat. Clarke and Octavia put their hands on top.

Then Raven screams, “Operation E.B. has started!” And they all throw their hands in the air, thrilled to find out the identity of mister muscles.

  
  


* * *

 

 

With a soft knock on her door, Lexa stirs awake, not to her full senses yet. Opening one eye, she sees sunlight pouring through a gap between her curtains and hears the birds singing their lovely morning songs. She loves the music the birds make, it is peaceful and relaxing to listen to.

The door opens and her sister Anya steps in the room with a tray filled with breakfast stuff.

“Hey there party girl! Had a good night? Meet some nice people?” She puts the tray next to Lexa and sits down at her foot end.

“It was fine." Hesitanly she then says, "I actually met a really nice girl.” Lexa smiles as she thinks back to the moment. Clarke’s radiant blue eyes are still engraved in her mind. The conversation with the blonde, although short, was very pleasant. And she is also going to Ark college! I so hope I see her back again! Lexa thinks. Though she isn’t really sure what to say to Clarke. She must already have lots of friends. What could she contribute to anyone? Shaking the negative thoughts from her head she looks at Anya and smiles. “Her name is Clarke, we only talked for a short time but she seems very nice and kind. And she studies at Ark college as well. So I hope I’ll see her again.”

Anya gives her knee a squeeze. “That’s great Lex.” She smiles back at her sister. She knows Lexa is very apprehensive of people. Especially after all the crap she took from her closest ‘friends’. Being the protective big sister she only wants the best for her and it is great that Lexa maybe finally meet some new friends. She is not very talkative and most of the times she has to push her for information. Some new friends, who hopefully are trustworthy and kind to her, would definitely be good for her.

“How was your night?” Lexa asks as she takes a sandwich from the tray and proceeds to put some extra cheese on it.

“I had to finish some work related stuff, but then I watched some Netflix with Stracciatella ice cream so that’s definitely a night good spend!”

“Safed some for me?” Lexa looks at her sister hopefully.

“Of course, but you better eat it today or I can’t promise you anything.” With a wink, Anya gets up and let Lexa eat in peace.

“I’m meeting up with a friend from high school this afternoon in town. Will you be fine?” She asks as she stands by the door.

“Yes of course. Eating all the ice cream!”

Laughing, Anya leaves the room and closes the door behind her.

Taking another sandwich, Lexa gets out of bed and opens the curtains. Then she hops in bed again as she already misses the soft blanket and the warmth. She is fine with being alone today. Most of the times she is alone. Her sister’s job is very demanding and many times she has to stay longer at work or finish it at home. Anya is very ambitious and passionate about her work. Being a lawyer isn’t the easiest job, especially when just starting. You have to prove yourself time and time again. But Anya is very driven and Lexa admires that in her. To have something to be so passionate about, it must be great. Anya’s eyes always sparkle when talking about the future.

As regards to her own future, she has no idea what it might bring for her. She still likes psychology but isn’t sure what she wants to do after her study. Work, study something else, go abroad? She still has time fortunately. She should enjoy her student life more. After all, it is supposed to be the best time of her live right? But why doesn’t it feel that way…

Finishing her breakfast, she walks to the closet to change to something comfortable which she can wear all day. On her cabinet is a picture of her and Anya, both smiling and both very young. Her young self looks happy and carefree. _Oh how the times have changed._

The rest of the day is filled with ice cream and Netflix and thinking about a certain blonde who can't seem to leave her mind.


	5. Easy peasy!

Walking towards the university building, Clarke thinks back at her first two weeks at her new university and new study. Things are going great actually. She really loves medicine. It is challenging and very interesting. There is so much to learn about the human body. Sometimes she marvels at how complex the human body is. With all the tiny cells each and every organ is made off, it is quite amazing. Of course she has to know all the names of all those tiny cells, _in Latin_ , but she is very motivated to learn everything she can and to become a valuable doctor. And although in medicine there is also pressure from her fellow peers to learn hard and to keep up with the subject matter, it isn’t the same as in her former study. There, her classmates were always boasting and praising their own artwork. Being cocky and insufferable. But that may also have got to do with the fact that she went to one of the most prestigious and private art academy in the world. Heavily encouraged by her mother of course. Who only had to send a letter with her name signed at the bottom to ensure a place for Clarke.

Her classmates in med school are kind and friendly. They are ambitious and want to learn a lot of things, but not to the extent that they have to step on other people’s back to accomplish more.

She already made friends with this girl called Echo. She also transferred from a different university. Previously studying law but now turning to medicine. She was also pushed by her parents to study law, which she didn’t actually want. It is quite a similar story to her own and with those similarities, and also in general the same interests, the bond was quickly made. She is thankful for that as she was afraid that people would be the same as at her previous study. Fortunately not and she feels like she can finally breath again after the stressful year at art school.

It is also great that she gets to see her friends more. She had a lot of catching up to do with Raven and Octavia because art school was at the other side of the country and she just wasn’t able to do a quick visit. But now they are reunited and it has been amazing to see her friends almost every day again. They always put a smile on her face and know when to cheer her up.

Last year, she would sometimes call them up in the middle of the night, all the way across the country, to complain about her mother who made Clarke feel insecure and sombre. It didn’t matter to them that it was in the middle of the night (or very early in the morning).

Being the most protective of the two, Octavia called every couple of days to check on her as she knew that when she would feel lonely, she would go out and party and drink away the loneliness. After high school, Clarke didn’t want to fall back on those bad habits but that was easier said than done when she felt miserable most of the times. Many times she would find her bed again safe and sound but other times she would wake up next to a boy she didn’t know or so drunk that people had to help her get home.

Of course her mother didn’t know this. Otherwise she would get a sermon about her wrongdoings and how a disappointment she was. Her father would just hum in compliance with her mother and read the newspaper. Other times, her mother was the sweetest person on earth. She could remember the good old days when she was young when her mother had learned her all the techniques used for painting. From oil painting to watercolour. With fine precision and patience, and even jokes in between, she would teach Clarke all there is to know about art. Her father would tell made up stories about the life of famous painters like Van Gogh or Leonardo da Vinci. He always made her laugh and put her in bed. Over the years, things have changed for the worse. With more fierce competition in the art field, her parents had to work day and night to keep up their good name. They didn’t really have a lot of spare time left and as a result, quality time with the whole family was set on the down low.

Still, her parents mean a great deal to her and now, when she wasn’t home all the time, their relationship with them improved when she sporadically came over for the holidays.

Her phone buzzes in her pocket and she takes it out to read a message in her WhatsApp group. It’s called the Thunderpussies and consists of Raven, Octavia and her. Of course Octavia came up with that name.

 

_**Octopus (9.10 A.M.): Hey you! Where are you? Thought meeting at 9?** _

 

Looking at the time she lets out a little puff and starts to walk faster. Totally lost in her thoughts she walked slower than she meant to and now had to rush.

 

_**Princess (9.11 A.M.): Chill out, coming straight away. 2 min tops.** _

 

_**Ravey (9.12 A.M.): Get your booty over here!**_

 

She looks up ahead and sees Ark college standing tall and proud. Walking on the sidewalk and rushing past other students she pushes one of the main doors open and walks towards the cafeteria.

Ark college is a beautiful old building, furnished with elegant yet cosy and comfy chairs all over the place. The library is huge with lots of studying places. Perfect for when she has to learn all the Latin names of all the bones in the body. And there are a lot of them!

Searching for Raven and Octavia, she enters the cafeteria. It is a big open space furnished with a lot of tables and chairs. There are cosy places designed for students who want to eat and drink some coffee and there are even couches and big chairs to hang out with friends. It radiates a kind of peace and also the perfect place to meet each other. The acoustic is well thought about, because even though you hear other’s people noise, it is not that loud and you can still have a private conversation with each other without having to go to a secluded area.

At the left side of the cafeteria is the place where all the food is stored and where you can get coffee or other drinks.

Spotting her friends at a table in the middle, Clarke walks over to them, already with a smile on her face.

“Hey guys! Sorry, was a bit preoccupied with my thoughts…”

She sits down in the chair next to Octavia and puts her bag on the floor.

“It’s okay. We all know princesses have special privileges.” Octavia smirks as she winks at Clarke.

They came up with the nickname for Clarke when they were little kids. It’s not exactly clear how the nickname emerged but when the three of them were playing with dolls, Clarke _always_ wanted to play with the princess. She even begged her mother for hours to buy her a princess dress and wear that to school. From that moment on, Clarke became known as princess and now almost everybody who knew her called her that way occasionally .

“Funny...” Clarke glares at Octavia. Then turning to Raven, “Have you already started with the meeting?”

Raven nodded and started to fill Clarke in about the things she missed.

The last couple of days Raven, Clarke and Octavia have been discussing and arguing about operation E.B. Every time they had to go to the university, their eyes were wide open in search for Lincoln. But it wasn’t a success yet.

“It is no use..” Octavia slumps back in her chair after Raven briefed Clarke. “If he actually is studying here at Ark college we should have seen him right?” She pouts, looking at the other girls for confirmation.

“Well, you know how big this university is right? There are literally tens of thousands of students studying here. So it could just be that there are too many people?” Clarke replies.

They asked about every person they know if they knew someone called Lincoln but no luck yet.

“Did he say what he was studying O?” Raven asks.

“Yes, but I can’t remember! It was too long and difficult and I was not totally in my best condition that evening…”

Clarke smirks and says, “You can say that again.”

“If he wanted to have contact with me again he could just have come to my dorm room right? He even brought me home! So if that isn’t a clear message than I don’t know what is…” With a sombre face, Octavia looks down at the table and plays with a piece of paper. Ripping it up in little pieces.

“Maybe he just forgot where you room was O. There are many dorms here on campus. Don’t give up yet…” Clarke says but doesn’t look too confident either.

Octavia is very right about how Lincoln knows about her room Clarke thinks. _If he wanted to see her he would just have visited her right?_ So maybe Octavia is right and they should just quit operation E.B. once and for all. On the side, Clarke also had her eyes open for Lexa. But to no avail, she also didn’t spot the brown haired girl.

Suddenly Clarke and Octavia jump up in their chairs, startled by a loud sound. With shocked faces they look at Raven who has an angry look on her face and is now rubbing her hand because she slammed her fist hard on the table.

“No! I see it in your eyes! We won’t give up! O, this is actually the first time you talked about a guy as if he has potential! You were never as enthusiastic about someone before!”

With glimmering eyes she looks at the two girls and continuous, “Remember operation Scarlett?”

Nodding vigorously Octavia and Clarke let Raven continue.

“Did we give up? No! Did we quit? No! Even when you, O, were running half naked across campus and you, Clarke, had your hair painted pink, did we give up?”

With a smile and a questioning look on her face she looks at the girls opposite of her.

“NOOO!” Octavia and Clarke yell.

All three are laughing out loud now, remembering the good old times. Some students at the tables surrounding them are looking at them with weird looks on their faces.

After a laughing fit the three of them sit back straight in their chairs. Wiping her tears from her eyes from all the laughing, Octavia smiles and says, “You’re right. We shouldn’t give up. One day we will find him!”

“Easy peasy lemon squeezy!”

 

* * *

 

 

During the next hour, the girls finish their meals and chit chat about all kinds of things.

“Okay guys, I’m going to the library. Anyone coming as well?” Clarke asks as she gets up from her chair and picks up her bag.

“No I can’t.” Raven answers as she checks her watch. “I have a lecture in about 10 minutes.”

“Me neither. I have a practicum and I have to be there for a change.” Octavia says.

Swinging her bag on one shoulder she looks at Octavia and Raven, “Dinner still on for tonight?”

“Sure it is princess!” Raven answers and smiles at her.

 

Waving her two best friends goodbye she walks out of the cafeteria and on to the library, in the meantime looking for a particular brown-haired girl in the crowds of people passing by.

Suddenly she feels a hand touching her shoulder and turns around, a bit startled.

“Octavia! What’s going on? Missing me already?”

“Hey Clarke,” Octavia softly says as she stands in front of her. An earnest look on her face. “Miss you always,” winking at her as she continuous, “I just… I noticed that you were a bit absent minded the last couple of days. Lots of staring and day-dreaming. And being late to our meeting, it is not like you. Is there something on your mind? I just wanted to ask in case there is anything wrong you know? Don’t want to worry Raven.”

Clarke didn’t think anyone would notice her staring off into space. But apparently Octavia knows her too well.

 

“Well uh- actually… It’s just… At the party two weeks ago, I- I met a girl outside in the garden when I took a walk. I don’t know… Do you know the feeling when you meet someone for the first time and immediately you hit off with them? It feels the same with this girl O. I don’t get this feeling too often… I didn’t talk to her for that long but she is really nice. And now she is on my mind all the time… like I cannot even stop thinking about her. She is so beautiful… It feels kind of ridiculous.”

Feeling the heat creep up her cheeks she looks at Octavia.

Octavia looks back at her with kind and sincere eyes. Feeling this is a big thing for Clarke to say, she moves in and gives her a big hug.

“There is nothing wrong with that you know.” She murmurs in her hair.

With a big sigh, Clarke returns the hug and then softly speaks, “I know, but it scares me…”

After a minute or so, Octavia releases Clarke and smiles at her. “I will always be there for you.”

Clarke smiles back. Grateful for such a good friend.

“Is she studying here at Ark college?”

“Yes actually, she studies psychology. I already stalked the health department in which the psychology study is situated but no success yet…”

“You will find her one day Clarke. We shouldn’t give up on Lincoln just as you shouldn’t give up on mystery girl.”

“We’ll see…”

“Aaaand I’ve got to run as usual, or I will be late to the practicum! See you this evening Clarke!” Octavia says as she starts walking fast towards the end of the hallway. At the end it parts in a T-junction, and she takes the right pathway, vanishing from sight.

Clarke is actually glad that Octavia asked about how she feels. Some weight has dropped of her shoulders. This was bothering her the past couple of days but she didn’t know how to talk to her friends about it. She indeed thinks of Lexa a lot. And it scares her because she never had such strong feelings towards another person. Definitely not a girl… She doesn’t quite know what this all means but she is more than willing to find out, hoping she sees the girl again soon.

 

Filling up her bottle at a drinking water fountain, she walks towards the big doors of the library. Ark college is a very old building. It was restored in its old grandeur a couple of years ago because it was starting to fall apart a bit. Nothing dangerous, but paint was chipping off the walls and the interior definitely needed an upgrade. So where most of the interior has changed for new, modern equipment and looks, the library has been kept in its old style. Thankfully they did! When walking through the doors for the first time, Clarke’s mouth actually fell open when being met with its beauty. Knowing a lot about architecture from her previous study she admired how they built this grand room with all those tiny details.

There are, of course, a lot of books, arranged in bookcases made from dark mahogany wood. They are high, so to reach the top books you have to use a ladder if you’re short. The lighting in the room is perfect, giving it a cosy and fantasy look.

Lots of study places are arranged in the area. With the choice of big group tables, small tables in plain sight or hidden behind bookcases to give you privacy and quit. There are also little rooms in which you can discuss study related problems with other people.

All in all, it was amazing and Clarke loved it!

She had already found her favourite spot in the whole library. It is on the second floor at the end of the row between two bookcases. It is a good spot to study and learn because not many people sit there so it is nice and quit. And it is next to a big window with a view of the forest next to the university which is nice and calming to look at.

Her spot consists of two big tables against each other, so it has place for two people. Fortunately not many people find this spot because the couple of times when she sat here, there wasn’t anyone else.

 

When Clarke walks up towards the tables she already sees a bag and some books lying on the first table. The person belonging to it is not in sight.

Clarke looks around the second floor for other spaces where she can work alone, as she actually prefers it that way, but at this time of day, more people had the idea to study in the library so there are not many free places left. Deciding for this spot then, she sits down at the other table and takes her laptop and her books out of her bag. This period, she has to read about the brain and how it is sorted into different lobes like the frontal or temporal lobe. It is quite an interesting subject and with vigour she starts reading the book, taking notes on her laptop.

She hears soft footsteps walking closer towards the table. It is probably the other student sitting here she thinks so she doesn’t look up, engrossed in the literature.

Then she hears a soft, melodic voice, “Clarke?”

She looks up and stares straight into green eyes.

The eyes who roamed in her mind every day.

The eyes who she sees so clearly every time she thinks of her.

 

Those eyes; they can only belong to one person… Lexa


	6. Again

Walking past the students, Lexa takes a sip of her coffee and nearly burns her tongue. Cursing silently to herself for it being so hot, she walks up the stairs in the library to the second floor.

  
She doesn’t actually want to be here. It is far too crowded and noisy for her liking to decently study. But she didn’t have a choice. Normally she studies at home but her dear sister had her friend over for the night and gosh can’t she stand their sappy voices. They’re calling each other all kinds of pet names in a sappy voice. Like _Anya-bananya come here sweety! Oh Trevs!_ No, she can’t stand it and so she escapes. It’s not like Trevor will stay forever. Her sister is very picky regarding men and so her boyfriends never stay for a long time as she always finds flaws in them that she can’t handle. Be that a Woods characteristic, because well, her whole family is picky and only accepts the best. Which she experienced the hard way…

  
Oh well, at least she found a nice spot on the second floor and studying actually went very well this morning. She was able to concentrate on the material so that’s good.

  
Walking between the large bookcases, she looks at all the books presented in them. There are so many! She likes reading and being around so many books is just amazing. Although they are mostly college books, so by definition boring, she wishes she could have them all.

  
They wouldn’t fit in the house though and Anya already whines at her when she brings a book home from a store because there is little room. True, but then, that book was longing to be bought and looked very lonely so Lexa just had to buy it. And of course her sister couldn’t stay mad at here, especially when she looked up at her with her big puppy eyes. A look she had mastered when living the past couple of years with Anya, and it definitely payed off because now she could get away with almost everything, like eating the last bit of ice-cream, or eat the last home-made cookie, or steal Anya favourite, big, fluffy sweater.

  
Smiling to herself she walks around the last bookcase and stops dead in her tracks, almost spilling her drink.

  
There is a person sitting at the table across from where she is seated.

  
Normally she wouldn’t bother with another student sitting at the same study spot, it would only be a minor inconvenience as she likes to study alone. This particular student however, she didn’t expect to see her again, as she hadn’t seen her the last couple of weeks. She recognised her immediately, blonde hair falling shortly past her shoulders and soft blue eyes looking at her laptop with slender hands tapping away on her keyboard.

  
It was Clarke, of course it was Clarke.

  
The mysterious girl from the party and the girl who left a great impression on her. She couldn’t believe her eyes! Since she had seen Clarke, the blonde haired girl frequently invaded her mind. She wondered who she was and were she came from, always hoping to see her again. And right now she was sitting right opposite of her!

  
Okay now she was staring and standing like an idiot for 5 minutes on the same spot. Come on Lexa, you can do this! She mentally gave herself a little push and gripped her coffee extra tight. Walking towards Clarke she could feel the tingles spreading in her stomach.

  
“Clarke?” She asked as she puts her cup of coffee on the table.

  
Clarke snaps her head up and locks eyes with her. Those radiant blue eyes, it’s like a deep ocean and Lexa already feels herself drowning.

  
Clarke is staring intently at her and Lexa feels a blush creeping up her cheeks.

  
“Lexa! I-uh, didn’t expect you here! It’s so nice to see you again!” Clarke smiles at her, radiant white teeth showing in two perfect straight rows.

  
Lexa smiles back and sits down on her chair.

  
“Likewise. So you’re studying here as well?” _Ugh, of course Clarke is studying here as well. Or she wouldn’t be here. Such a stupid question._

  
Looking at Clarke she expects her to laugh, but she isn’t . Instead Clarke looks at her with a soft, mesmerising look on her face and Lexa can’t help but blush. _Why is Clarke looking at her like that?_

  
“Yes I am.” Clarke answers and tucks a strand of blonde hair behind her ear. “I really like this big library with all those books and its atmosphere. When there aren’t too many people studying it is great for getting things done. Uhm, you were studying psychology right?”

  
Happy that Clarke remembers Lexa nods, “Yeah that’s right.” Lexa continuous to passionately talk about her study, because it’s something she loves and enjoys very much.

  
After a bit of pleasant chit-chatting, the girls both turn back to their books and laptop and start studying.

  
Well, at least an attempt at it, because it isn’t going that smoothly. She is trying, but Lexa can’t concentrate for one bit. It’s just… Clarke is sitting right opposite of her and she can’t stop herself from steeling glances at the blonde haired girl. So now she is staring out of the window.

  
She doesn’t like the topic of this period either, which happens to be statistics and which happens to suck. It is quite difficult to keep up with the lectures and understand the literature.

  
Her concentration level isn’t very high the last couple of days. When working at home, Anya occasionally had to tap her head because she was daydreaming again. Thinking about nothing and anything at the same time. And now sitting here, she can’t concentrate at all. Not with Clarke sitting across from her. Clarke with her nice smile and beautiful eyes.

  
Shutting her own eyes closed and rubbing them with her hands, she sighs. Those are dangerous thoughts and she knows it. Clarke is a very attractive girl but she can’t think like that. It isn’t right and it will only end for the worse.

  
She thinks back of other times. Dark and lonely times. With only one little light in the middle, Costia. But that didn’t end well at all. And she hates that she has to think about that whole situation because she can feel the lump already rising in her throat. _No, NO!_

  
Suddenly she feels a hand on her arm. She jerks her arm away from it, only to recognise a second later the hand belongs to Clarke.

  
“Are you okay?” Clarke asks with worry in her eyes. She is leaning across her table, her hand still resting on Lexa’s desk.

  
Lexa looks at her and sees the concern etched on her face. “I- uh, y-yes. It’s… nothing. I actually have to go now. I- uh- have to be at home. My sister…” Stumbling over her words Lexa stands up and puts her belongings in her backpack.

  
She has to get away. She is making a fool of herself and she knows it. She can’t show weakness. Too many times when showing her true self, people close to her exploited it and made sure her life became a living hell.

  
Oh well, making friends was never easy for her and it looks like this time it won’t be working as well.

  
Hastily she picks up her empty cup, but then drops it on the table. Cursing under her breath (Stupid!) she picks it up and slings her backpack on one shoulder.

  
“Wait, Lexa!”

  
She looks up at Clarke and sees the note in her right hand, pointing at her.

  
Taking the note she sees a mobile phone number written across it.

  
“Look,” Clarke continues, “I don’t know if something is wrong but if you wanted to talk, I’ll be there for you. Maybe we can meet up for coffee sometime?”

  
Lexa can feel her heart jump at the incredibly sweet gesture Clarke made. The sympathy on her face is showing and Lexa feels all tingly inside.

  
“So give me a ring if you want to, ok?” Clarke asks and smiles softly at her. “I’m glad we met again Lexa.”

  
“I… thank you Clarke.” Lexa says as she smiles. Then, with a small wave, she walks away from the table towards the stairs and out of sight from Clarke.

 

* * *

 

  
Frowning, Clarke watches Lexa walk away from their place. She is worried about the girl who so suddenly left the place like she saw a ghost or something like that.

  
She was shocked at first when she discovered the person sitting across from her was Lexa! They had a very nice conversation about all sorts of things. She could tell Lexa was passionate about her study in the way her body language showed when she talked about psychology. She enjoyed every hand gesture, the sparkle in her eyes and the way her mouth moved when she talked. Being interested in her as well, Lexa asked questions about her current study. She did not yet get the opportunity to tell her about her previous one but that would be a topic to tell at their next meeting. Although… She wasn’t quite sure if Lexa would ring her number….

  
Both deciding to continue to study after their nice talk, they focused back on their material. But Clarke soon noticed that Lexa wasn’t in it with her head. She was unfocused and stared out of the window a lot. Glancing over at her a couple times she could see the girl wasn’t into it. But then again, Lexa told her this period she had statistics and Clarke shuddered at the thought already of dealing with that bump in the road. One time she looked over and saw that Lexa was chewing at the end of a pencil while staring out of the window. She was transfixed on those lips moving against the pencil and couldn’t look away. Suddenly Lexa turned her head and looked into Clarke’s eyes. Both blushing, they quickly averted their eyes. Continuing her studying, Clarke couldn’t help but look up at Lexa once in a while.

  
After an hour or so, she heard a sigh coming from the other table so she looked up. The brown haired girl was sitting with her elbows on the table and rubbing her eyes. She looked rather sad, all hunched together, so wanting to know if something’s wrong, Clarke leaned forward and put her hand on Lexa’s arm to notice the girl of her presence. Lexa then proceeded to throw her hand of her arm and shot her a bewildered look. Mumbling something about leaving and going to her sister she packed her bag and stood up to leave.

  
Clarke was genuinely worried for her as the girl in front of her radiated a kind of sadness that Clarke was more than willing to unravel and end. But seeing as this was not the time nor place to discuss this sorts of matters, she quickly thought of a way to reach out to Lexa and give her an opportunity to talk, on her own terms. So quickly scribbling down her phone number on a piece of paper, in a spontaneous act, she called Lexa by her name and gave her the note. The green eyed girl accepted the note and smiled at her. Finally she gave a little wave and was out of sight.

  
Now sighing to herself, Clarke wished things didn’t end so soon yet. Finally she met Lexa, and then she left so suddenly which made Clarke feel empty and not in the mood to study any more this afternoon. At least she had hope that the girl would call or text her. To find her again in this building would not be easy so she hoped Lexa would reach out, even just for a coffee alone, that would be great.

  
She smiled, thinking back of the party and their hushed conversation on the swing. Like today, Lexa was friendly, attentive and polite. She radiated mystery and today only proved that further. Clarke wished to get to know her better because those green eyes would definitely not get out of her mind any time soon. Especially after witnessing them in daylight, were they sparkled and shone bright, drawing Clarke towards them, not letting her go.

  
Deciding she did enough studying for today, well I can’t concentrate anyway so it’s no use staying here, she packed her stuff and left the library ready to go home and watch some Netflix before going over to O’s and Raven’s place.

 

* * *

 

  
Standing in front of the door, Lexa listened if there was any sound coming from within the house indicating that her sister and her ‘boyfriend’ were home. Relieved when hearing nothing, she opened the door and dropped her bag on the floor. She walked across the tiny hallway to her room and looked for some comfy clothes deciding she wouldn’t leave the house any time soon. When changing to sweatpants, she saw a note falling from a pocket in her jeans on the floor. Picking it up she turned it and recognised it was the note Clarke gave her with her phone number.

  
Smiling, she thought back of the lovely, sympathetic blonde who made her day! Until the moment she made a fool of herself of course… Which was not unusual for her, but still, a little embarrassing. Anyway, she didn’t know what to do with the note. Should she call Clarke or not? She was friendly and goodhearted, but you never know. Lexa knew all the best how people could say one thing and act the other. But maybe Clarke was different. She was so considerate by asking her if she was okay. And being the moron that she is, emotions ran too high and the only thing she could do was run. Just like former days, when she did nothing but run. Run away from her emotions, hiding them. Because if someone saw, they would get to her. Anya and her cousins and aunt were a different story. But even to them she didn’t like telling them in extent how she felt nowadays. Not wanting to think of those awful thoughts again, she locked her heart and put the note from Clarke in her piggy-bank on her desk. She had to think about Clarke and her offer some more before accepting it.

  
After changing she went to the living room and put on some random series from Netflix, happy that it exists in her life. On the screen, some girl, called the commander, was slaying some brutally looking people. Brave would be her second name, she did everything for her people. _Hmm, I could learn something from her_. She snuggled in her soft, silky blanket and watched the show with a pleasant feeling in her stomach.


	7. For the first time in forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A new chapter! I am sorry for the gap... University has started again, and it's super busy already... So unfortunately less time to write, but I will hope this chapter will be satisfying!

It was starting to get chilly outside so Clarke pulled the hood of her jacket over her head. It was only a 5 minute walk over to Raven’s and O’s dorm and so she hummed a song while walking on the sidewalk. There were approximately ten huge dorm buildings on the terrain of the university with many rooms suited for the students studying at Ark college.

Each floor in the dorm buildings consisted of multiple dorms with 2 rooms each. Each dorm had their own kitchen and bathroom but the whole floor shared a large common living room which was mostly used for parties. The floors and dorm buildings did differ though, some had the status of party floors and often the cops had to come to calm things down. Other dorm buildings were more silent and not much action happened there. Ideal for students who only wanted to study and not party.

Clarke herself lived in a dorm which was kind of mix between partying and quietness. Occasionally she had parties on her floor but not too many which was fine by her because she actually liked to sleep.  
Her roommate was a nice, quiet girl. There weren’t many similarities between the two of them, but they could live in peace with each other so it was a pleasant dorm to stay.  
Octavia and Raven lived on a floor were a lot of parties happened as well as the floor above them. Every time she visited them, someone held a party on their floor so it was never really quit there.

Reaching the front of the building, she buzzed their dorm number and waited for the door to open.

“Yeah, who is it?”

Clarke recognized the voice of Raven through the intercom.

“Let me in peasant, it is your queen.” Clarke joked as she spoke back.

“Oh of course my lady, enter the castle.” And with that, the buzzer ran and the main doors slid open.

She had to take the elevator all the way up to the 10th floor. Their dorm had a shared balcony and the view over the city was amazing, especially at night when all the lights were on. Many evenings she spend there with her friends, talking about life, and a opened bottle of wine by their side.

The door to the main floor was already opened so she walked the hallway to her friend’s apartment. The doors to some other apartments were opened so she could get a view of the inside and the interior of the kitchen. Most of them were very messy, with food and dishes atop the counter or even on the floor and walls. Shaking her head she walked towards the end of the hallway.

She always found it interesting to take a peek inside the houses or rooms of other people. They were a good indicator of what type of person lived in that space. How someone decorated their room mostly says a lot about their personality. From those kitchens she could tell that the persons living there at least weren’t very organised.

Finally entering the dorm of her friends, she walked towards the kitchen.

“Someone here?” She called while taking off her jacket.

Octavia’s head poked out of her room.

“Hey Clarke,” she smiled and stepped out of her room to give Clarke a hug.  
Together they walked towards the kitchen.

“So did you do any studying this afternoon?” Octavia asked Clarke.

“Well, actually… Not quite. I met Lexa, you know, the girl I told you about, from that party? She was seated right opposite of me in the library”

“No way!” Octavia exclaimed, “What is the coincidence of that happening?”

“Crazy right?… Maybe because we talked about her on the same day I guess…”

“Anyhow, that’s great Clarke. So how did it go?”

“Well… It didn’t last long…” Looking down at the floor with a frown on her face Clarke continued, “We chitchatted for a bit and then both started to study. But- I don’t know, something was clearly bothering her because she was slumped together one moment and had her hands before her face. Then I asked what was wrong and she jumped up and said she had to leave. It all was very weird, but mostly I just felt bad for her, she looked so sad…”

“Aw Clarke, that’s not good.”

Clarke looked up again, “Yeah, well, in an impulse I gave my number. Even though I don’t know her that well, I said she always could talk to me.”

“Ooohhh Clarke got a crush? Tell me more! Who is the lucky guy that got your number?” Raven jumped between the two girls, emerging from her room, and slung her arms around their shoulders.

“Actually it was a girl, and I only gave my number to talk because she looked sad.”

“A girl? That’s a change of game! I like it! No more boys, they are annoying anyways.”

“Rey, its nothing romantic… Just frie-,” Clarke tried to interject, but it was no use. Raven already began to sing a self-made up song about how boys are dull and foolish and dragged both of the girls by their arms to the table in the kitchen. Octavia just rolled her eyes and sat down. They both knew that Raven was crazy, a kind-hearted goof who was adorable in every way. And also unstoppable if she ever began to sing. And she sang a lot of times. Mostly just made-up songs about Clarke or Octavia, and most of the times they were _very_ offensive. But they always elicited a laugh from both of the girls, and this time was no exception.

“Come eat, and enjoy pizza di mama. Homemade and healthy and good for the children.” Raven spread her arms and then proceeded to take the pizza out of the oven.

“If you ever make a pizza by yourself, I will eat my hat.” Octavia said with a smirk as she took a bite from the pizza which was definitely not self-made.

“You don’t even own a hat.” Raven glowered back at her and put her arms together, defensively.

“Well, I am never going to need it, no?” Octavia said as she gave a victorious smile to Raven.

The banter between the girls continued while Clarke silently enjoyed her pizza. It was too much fun to hear her two friends mock each other, knowing that it was nothing serious.

 

* * *

 

The evening proceeded with pleasant conversations and lots of laughing. After a while the conversation moved from the kitchen to Raven’s room who had a couch and a flat screen.  The room itself was lit by soft glowing hanging lights and some candles which created the perfect atmosphere. It was perfect and cosy and the three girls basked in their long-time friendship which would only grow longer as time progresses.

Even though the evening itself was very enjoyable, Clarke couldn’t help but sometimes think of Lexa. Still a little bit worried about the girl, she hoped that her sister would take care of her. But soon her mind drifted back to the conversation with her friends.  
  
Most of the times when spending an evening with her friends, Clarke just stayed over for the night, for the five minute walk being too long and the evening sky being too cold to even consider walking back to her own dorm room.  
This night was no different from other nights, proceeding in almost the same ways it always went, with one exception though. This time, she kept her phone very close to her, never losing sight of the device. She had a glimmer of hope and waited patiently for that one call or text, for maybe the pretty, brown-haired girl would want to take a coffee with her.

 

* * *

 

Lexa turned and tossed, not able to fall asleep soon. Her mind was far too occupied to fall asleep. She cursed and tried to silence her thoughts but to no avail. She only knew too well how thoughts could be dominant and overruling, always there to haunt you. Sometimes she was able to put a stop to her thoughts, but most nights she just stayed awake for a long time before falling asleep. And then she would occasionally wake up in the middle of the nights from daunting nightmares.

Her sister knew of her nightmare, sometimes she would wake up screaming and bathing in sweat. Anya would come running into her room trying to calm her down. Now, she learned to control her verbal eruption, but she still woke up startled and disorientated, mostly frightened of the horrible scenes that played in her head during sleep. She didn’t tell Anya anymore, though she suspected her sister knew she still had nightmares.

She didn’t tell Anya that much about her private life, only when her sister would ask, she would tell, not wanting to disturb her or burden her.  
She really did want to tell Anya about herself, but something inside her kept her from speaking up. She also didn’t want to bother her sister with her pesky complaints. Compared to her sister they were of course nothing of great importance. Anya had to juggle so many things in life, like rent, having a demanding job and keeping care of her little sister.  She wouldn’t want to worry her more already.  
So now she herself had to deal with her own thoughts. They were consummating and energy demanding. She hated how her own false thoughts could take such control over her. She learned to deal with them over time, but it wasn’t always perfect and like tonight, her strategy wasn’t helping.  
She did know that talking about them helped, but not wanting to disturb her sister, she didn’t know who to turn to. Her aunt and nephews were amazing and friendly people, but they already had to deal with so many things in their life, it was hardly fair that she would lay her distress on them.

Her friends from former times were all gone and making friends at university was difficult. There were some really nice people, but most contact just stayed platonic with only sporadic conversations about personal matters. They weren’t really her friends and she didn’t see them outside of university.

So with nothing left, she took her silly little cuddle bear and gave it a hug. She got the teddy bear from Anya  as a gift when she was 5 years old. By now it was old and worn out, with one eye missing, but with so many good memories that she treasured Mister Pooh bear every day. She named him Mister Pooh bear after the famous Winnie the Pooh, which she watched every day when she was little. Not bearing any resemblance to the real bear actually, but apparently she didn’t mind when she was young.  
The teddy bear often gave her comfort, albeit little.

Letting her thoughts roam free, no point in stopping them, she glanced around in her room. Her eyes fell on her phone which was currently laying on her nightstand.

Well... there was actually one person she maybe could talk too. Thinking back of her encounter with Clarke a couple of days ago, she picked up her phone. The number Clarke gave, was already stored in her contacts.

She scrolled to Clarke’s number and paused. _Could she text Clarke?_ It all felt so silly, just because she couldn’t sleep. But Clarke did say she could talk to her. _So that definitely means she could send her a message right?_ Lexa exhaled, not sure of herself. It was already 2 a.m. in the morning, so Clarke definitely was asleep… _And she didn’t even know Clarke_ …

Chewing her bottom lip, she typed a message, still unsure of herself. Hovering her thumb over the send button, she thought of reasons not to send the message. But she still felt sad and that feeling definitely wouldn’t go away any time soon.

Finally, Lexa pushed the button and let the message cross the distance in space between their cell phones.

**_Lexa (2.03 A.M.): Hey Clarke, are you awake? I just uh, you gave me your number so… I’m Lexa btw, from the library the other day?_ **

  
She regretted sending it immediately and quickly send another message.

**_Lexa (2.04 A.M.): I’m so sorry… It is way too late… Just ignore my message, you’re probably sleeping anyway..._ **

With a groan she put her phone back on the nightstand and turned around in her bed, trying to find a comfortable position so she could fall asleep. That wouldn’t happen soon though, she felt mortified already. _Why do I always do dumb things_? Always making a fool of myself. Well, at least Anya often has a laugh about it, so that’s something positive. It was true, she was actually very clumsy in both social aspects and in life aspects in general. A day wouldn’t pass were she wouldn’t spill something on her cloths or break something or just say and do weird things. Her sister always laughed affectionately at her clumsiness and gave her a pat on her head…

Suddenly she heard her phone buzz, which meant she got a message. Quickly she picked up her phone and unlocked it. On the screen was a message from Clarke! Did she wake her up?  
Feeling a little nervous, she opened it.

**  
_Clarke (2.10 A.M.): Hey Lexa! I just came back from a dorm party so no worries,  I’m still awake :) How bout you? Can’t sleep?_ **

**_Lexa (2.12 A.M.): I’m glad I didn’t wake you… No I can’t sleep…_ **

**_Lexa (2.13 A.M.): My head feels like its gonna explode anytime soon_ **

**_Lexa (2.13 A.M.): Just bad thoughts…_ **

  
It felt strange telling Clarke such intimate things about herself. She didn’t know the girl that well, but still… It felt very comforting to tell Clarke these things.

**  
_Clarke (2.16 A.M.): Aw, that sucks. Does that happen often?_ **

**_Lexa (2.19 A.M.): Actually, most of the nights… It just takes a long time for me before I fall asleep…_ **

**_Clarke (2.20 A.M.): What are you thinking of then?_ **

  
Lexa hesitated, not sure what to send back. Her life was a bit in shambles right now, but it was unfair to throw it all on Clarke so suddenly.

**  
_Lexa (2.25 A.M.): Just about life I guess…_ **

**_Clarke (2.27 A.M.): Well, life sucks sometimes, so it’s perfectly normal to worry about it!_ **

  
What if Clarke really knew how much she worried about life? Would she still consider it normal? Or would she think she was a freak?

**  
_Lexa (2.28 A.M.): I guess so…_ **

**_Lexa (2.29 A.M.): Now it’s way too late and you must be tired. I will try to go to sleep and not bother you…_ **

**_Clarke (2.32 A.M.): You didn’t bother me Lexa. I hope you can fall asleep soon. What always helps for me, whenever I have bad thoughts, is looking at pictures of kittens, maybe that will help a little bit :) And my offer on getting a coffee still stands, no pressure though ;)  
_ **

  
Lexa felt her heart clench as a result of the sweet message Clarke send her. She was so considerate! And so kind, just talking to a stranger in the middle of the night. She could have ignored the message but she didn’t. She definitely wanted to take on her offer of getting some coffee, she wanted to get to know Clarke better. Maybe she would finally have a new friend.  


**_Lexa (2.34 A.M.): I will have a look at kittens, thank you Clarke_ **

**_Lexa (2.35 A.M.): And I would like to drink coffee sometime :)_ **

**_Clarke (2.36 A.M.): That’s great! Maybe sometime next week? I’ll get in touch with you for a specific date! For now, sleep well and have sweet dreams :)_ **

**_Lexa (2.37 A.M.): I will hear from you soon then :) Have a good night Clarke_ **

**_Clarke (2.38 A.M.): Thank you, I am glad you texted me :)  
_ **

****

* * *

 

Reading the last message from Clarke over and over, Lexa still couldn’t believe Clarke had sent her that. She actually was glad that Lexa texted her! She felt tears well up, as she put her phone back on her nightstand. It was a long time ago that someone had been this nice to her, except of course for Anya and her aunt and nephews. She still couldn’t comprehend it fully. Maybe this was the start of something new. Maybe, just maybe she finally would get a real friend, someone who would be there for her in times of need. But who was she kidding? She didn’t even know if Clarke wanted to be friends…

It did take quite a while for Lexa to finally fall asleep. If one actually would enter her room, they would find the brown-haired girl fast asleep with a smile plastered on her face. A stark contrast with most other nights, where you could see the fear and the frowns etched on her face.

For the first time in forever, her dreams weren’t quelled by her demons. No, instead it was a certain pretty, blonde haired girl who invaded her dreams, defeating her demons one by one.


End file.
